[:zh]哭泣,无声……[:en]Cry, Silently…

[:zh]昨天和聪聊了一会儿,他回国也有一段时间了,一直没有他的消息,现在终于联系上了。他还是那样,像个大哥,训起话来涛涛不绝,让你没有任何反击之力。

他没有像富家子弟那样吃父母的,他也一直在为自己的将来打拼。尽管如此,因为我们的家庭,生活背景都不一样,对他来说,也许一切都来得很自然,什么都已按照好了,只要去按步就班地做就好了。即便他哪一天累了,也不用去愁没有落脚的地方。可是我呢,为了自己曾经所谓的梦想到了异国他乡,朋友们羡慕,赞扬,背后的艰辛又有谁知道呢。梦想,一个虚无缥缈的东西,一但实现,生活一下却又没有了方向。实现了梦想能干什么?就满足了吗?我自己也说不清楚。只觉得自己现在很无助,很迷茫,很无聊。每天很早就会醒,可是醒来了干嘛?于是又继续睡,过着猪一样的生活。拼命地打球麻痹自己,让自己很累很累,没有时间去想自己的将来。

乔金说我哭的时候很安静,因为我不想哭,即使哭也不想让别人知道,只是想找个角落,一个人,静静地……压抑了实在太久了,跟聪聊完之后,之前胡思乱想的东西一下子全涌了出来,泪,止不住的流,为了我不知道的前程,为了我那年过半百还辛劳工作的父母。

不知道自己想说什么,也不知道自己说了什么,拿这篇来扫扫我好久没有打理的博客。朋友们不要为我担心,我会好的!

[:en]I talked with Cong for a while yesterday. He has been to China for a few weeks, I haven’t gotten any news from him, finally, he’s still alive. He is still as before, like a big brother, bla bla talks about his experiences.

He is not like the kind of person that has powerful background, he is so independant, he want’s to fight himself. But we still have diffent background. He won’t be worried one day he is tired and don’t wanna fight any more. But not me, to find a bright future for myself, to achieve my childhood dreams, I came to Sweden. Everyone envies me. They thought I was lucky and would live better than them. But it’s not true, indeed. The life here is so stressful.

Dream, is just nothing, once you achieve it, you will nothing to do, and you get nothing from it but some kind of satification.

I’m bored, I really wanna work. I don’t wanna sleep for long every day, but I can’t do anything if I get up, so I just keep sleeping. I play badminton almost everyday, let myself be very tired, so I won’t have time to think about my future.

Joacim said I was so quiet when I was crying. Because I don’t wanna cry, I don’t wanna let anyone know I’m crying. I just wanna find a corner, only me. But finally I cried, for my unknown future, for my parents who are still working hard for me.

I don’t want to say, I don’t what did I say. This post just to tell people I’m alive. Dear friends, don’t worry about me, I’ll be OK.

10 Comments:

  1. 一定要坚强,相信你的,一直都是,总是能够抗得其自己的困难,也能够看到自己的未来。任何时候都不想没有路,因为你一直在这个征程上前行,走过去,就是路,走过去,就是未来。

    [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-2-7 02:18
  2. 还好啦,被聪打击了一下,也好,省得天天的无聊

    clarezoe [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-3-7 15:56
  3. honey, are you ok? 非常想念你啊,你要好好的加油,做一直以来充满勇气和自信的丁小飞“同学”!!I will miss you.

    ziyu [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-2-7 06:33
  4. 别哭~~~我也要面临找工作的压力了
    一起努力!
    只要能争取到第一份工作!

    eddysunrise [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-2-7 09:45
  5. 未尝不是一件好事,人得逼出来的啦,我就喜欢被逼的感觉 :mrgreen:

    liam [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-11-7 18:19
  6. 哈哈,我等你来逼我练球呢

    clarezoe [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-13-7 21:58
  7. O-O

    linuxwj [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-4-10 04:23
  8. 孩儿啊,咱们一起加油吧

    clarezoe [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-3-7 15:57
  9. 嗯,周期性发下牢骚,现在好多了

    clarezoe [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-3-7 15:55
  10. O-o,你也换sofish的这个ang…主题了啊

    linuxwj [:en]said on[:zh]发表于: 2008-31-12 16:04

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